Relationships

I have been watching Dr. Phil and i have some thoughts about how I he works with people...My thought is what is the most important thing to teach people about relating...

Well if there is a teaching, it is to learn to stay out of your partners business...Dr. Phil and other have programs that give you step by step directions for success...

In my own life I am learning to ask myself the question what am I believing in the moment...What do I believe I would have if my partner behaved differently...and usually I think I would have more understanding, a better relationship, peace...So what do I do to get this peace. I shout, demand, manipulate and get angry, ignore them, to have peace...I have begun to notice it doesn’t work it seems to give me what I don’t want rather then what I want…
Since I have the work of Byron Katie or rather the work has me. I take a break breath and do the work on what I thought being angry, shouting and demanding, would give me…and I come to see that its painful for me I hurt myself, and I stop (when I can) some times I say,” lets start over”…I love when I can do that…the result seems to be, I like me better and I have what I want, which is an intimate connect with the person I am with most of the time, me…and I get to have an intimate connection with my partner…and it is none of my business how she reacts…I take care of my part and how I react…and that is more kind to me and to her…I love that…
Thank you.